Back to Dead I
by Guns and Roses Galore
Summary: Max has near death experiences while on search for fang. Set after Fang
1. Intro

**Intro!**

I walked in the room completely out of breath "IGGY GET IN HERE RIGHT NOW!" I still somehow managed to yell at that dang pyro while completely out of breath. Iggy walked in innocently, completely ignoring the fact that our living room no longer has a roof "Hey what's up" "Iggy you know what's up, you need to fix the stinking roof before I get back or I will cut each one of your toes off then make you eat them!" and with that I took to the skies in search for the love my life, Fang.

Some days have been better than others since he left but most left me wondering what if he hadn't left. My flock is the only reason I haven't completely fell apart.


	2. Missing

I flew through the sky scanning the ground looking for fang. Although he left us months ago, I have searched everywhere I could but he was not anywhere near the house and I had searched all of Colorado dreaming of the day when he would returned but that's what it has remained for months. My flock has attempted to try to comfort me but it only made me feel worse.

Iggy was the one who really gets on my nerves. Once Fang left, Iggy was acting like I had completely forgotten him. Angel was completely opposite of him. Angel would come into my room at night when I was alone crying. It might help that she's a mind reader, you know it just might help. She was always there for me, she's my angel.

It was about midnight when I walked into Angel's room to talk to her about Fang, but when I entered the room I saw something completely different. Angel, my Angel, was gone.


	3. The Note

I was sitting in my room waiting for the others so that we could leave to find Angel when in the corner of my room I found a flicker of red. I went over carefully to the red expecting the worse. As it turns out it was a dozen red roses and a note from Fang.

_**Fangs Note:**_

Dear Max,

Here there are a dozen red roses 11 of them are real and one is fake. I will love you until the last one dies.

_Fang_


	4. The Touch

**Total: Why am I here?**

**Me: Shut up and eat your food can't you see I'm writing!**

**Total: But I hate dog food.**

**Me: *turns around and shoots the bowl with handgun* THEN DON'T EAT!**

I keep the note and roses to myself, not wanting them to fall into Iggy's hands. As we were preparing to go find Angel, Iggy kept complaining about how cold it was. I was holding in every urge to turn around and punch him when I felt a cold hand on my shoulder. I turned around in time only to see a glimpse of jet black hair rushing out the door.


	5. Side note

_**I am making this just to please my best friend. The sappy fang note from awhile back was theirs so there ya go, YOU HAPPY NOW FRIEND!**_


	6. Found

**Total: Can I have some real food now?**

**Me: *turns around and throws McDonalds hamburger on ground then goes back to writing next chapter***

**Total: But this contains dog meat.**

**Me: Quit complaining and just be cannibalistic for like one minute OKAY!**

The others we puzzled when I took off flying after what I think might be fang. This happened before, time after time leaving alone in a forest in Canada. But this time it was different, this time I had felt his hand touch my shoulder.

Flying is the most amazing thing anyone could imagine. I would recommend it to everyone. This time though I couldn't enjoy the beauty because I was searching for Fang. Just as I was about to give up I saw a dark figuring moving through the forest. This time I had him.


	7. Battle of the Fallen OCs

**YELLOW! Hi, I'm St. Iggy the Pyro, and I'm best friends with Guns and Roses Galore in REAL life (that thing that annoyingly happens when I don't spend time on the computer). I shall be writing this chapter. I'm pretty much like GNRG, except I have a sense of humor. **

**Disclaimer: If I owned Maximum Ride, Dylan would be gone, shot, dead. Fang would stop being such a jerk and Starfish boy would be the one to save the world…it's probably a good thing I don't own it…**

**My friend St. Iggy wrote this. I forgot her birthday and…well…I didn't want to be killed slowly and painfully. So I let her write this as a present.**

**Total: I'm scared…**

**Me: Me too…**

Today was turning out to be the most rotten day of my life. After five years of living in GNRG's closet, I had finally been let out into the world. The real world.

Now, you'd think that today would be quite amazing. I did at first too. That was, until GNRG told me why he had let me out.

You see, I was his first Original Character. Seeing as GNRG is a person of little creativity, I turned out looking exactly like the character Fang from Maximum Ride. Yep, from his emo black hair to his purple-black wings, I was and exact copy. A clone.

Yet, somehow when I jumped into the real world this morning, I wasn't expecting the angry fangirls…I know, dumb of me, but you have to remember that I'm new to this reality thing.

Guns and Roses Galore's words rang in my head "Just distract them, kay? I'll get around to saving you eventually!"

So here I was, running for my life, two angry fangirls looking for my blood.

"HOW DARE YOU RUN AWAY!" The one called St. Fang of Boredom* screamed. "WE GOT MARRIED OVER SKYPE!"

"HOW COULD YOU FORGET MY BIRTHDAY?" The one called St. Iggy the Pyro yelled out.

Normally, I would of replied with a good 'WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT FROM ME?" but really, at this point I was concerned with just staying alive. Up, Jump, Right, Left, NINJA ROLL! I thought, dodging herrings that were being chucked at me from all sides. I had the chance to think 'Where the heck are they getting all this fish?' before one hit me square in the face.

Oh God, they had me now! The walls were closing in! Fangirls and Original Characters closing in from every side! I was a gonner, done for, pushing up daisies, shuffled of my mortal coil, past my expiration date, terminated, dead as a door-nail, slain, fallen, not-coming-back-for-the-sequel dead.

That was a lot to take in, really.

Suddenly, two shadows appeared over me. I tensed, turning off of my back, trying for one last time to crawl away. I was met by a group of Original Characters like myself, surrounding me in a semi-circle, armed with jello grenades and armed with slimy gray fish. I looked over my shoulder, trying to guestimate exactly how much time I had to adopt a religion and pray before I was killed by the two crazed fangirls. Exactly ten seconds.

"UHHHHHH…." I muttered intelligently. "Ummm…aww screw it all. What did I ever do to you guys?"

The two fangirls exchanged glances. "Well, for starters, you escaped. Right when I needed your help too, you little ingrate!"

"I just want to destroy Guns and Roses Galore's story. To do that, I have to kill off the main character. Nothing personal really." St. Iggy the Pyro said her face passive.

"That was just the most sanely said insane thing I have ever heard." I muttered. "Look, I'm not Fang-" I started.

"FANG!" A voice raged from the sky.

"DAMNIT, ANYONE ELSE WANNA SAY IT?" I screamed angrily.

"Fang!" One of the Original Characters said, just to spite me.

I was in the process of coming up with a decent comeback when suddenly I was snatched up and thrown into the sky. 'Great, now even the birds are in on it. Traitors.' I thought bitterly.

"Fang! FLY!" A voice yelled out. I fell a few feet, weighing my options: possible escape with the mystery person or certain death by fangirls below.

I chose the first option.

I unfurled my wings for the first time, shakily flapping them weakly a few times. I kept falling, though my decent slowed pretty drastically. Frantically, I flapped even harder.

"Did you hurt your wing or something?" A girl suddenly dropped into my vision, large brown wings keeping her aloft. 'She looks like an angel.' I though, dazed. From her chocolate brown eyes to hair of only a slightly darker color, she was perfect.

I think I just fell in love.

The real Fang missed one flap mid flight, twitching midair. He swirled around, looking south. 'My Max senses are tingling.' He thought, before ignoring them and heading north once more.

(And now back to the story)

She was so perfect, in fact, that I knew she could only be one person. "Max?" I questioned uncertainly.

"No, I'm Nudge." She said, sarcasm burning in her voice. "Come on, we've gotta get you outta here."

"I can't fly." The words flew out of my mouth before I could stop them. She nodded once and then grabbed onto my wrist, pulling me along. "Help me out!" she huffed, and I began frantically flapping my wings once more.

It wasn't working. Soon, we were both loosing altitude, sinking, struggling to the earth below.

"Chikuso." St. Iggy the Pyro muttered in a foreign language. A Japanese OC gasped from the harsh curse word. A small shriek sounded out, and she turned around to see what was the matter. An OC of hers, Kiri, was locked in battle with and strange…giant grapefruit? "Ittai nani ga?" she muttered, confused.

Suddenly, all of the OCs were locked in a battle similar to the Mary Sue-ish Kiri.

"PURPLE IGLOOS!" St. Iggy's eyes widened. No, that voice, that randomness, it could only belong to one person. But she had taken care of him. She had plotted her revenge perfectly. She had-

-Just gotten hit by a purple jello grenade.

"UHRG!" She screeched, retching over the color of the disgusting jello.

"GUNS!" She screeched, yelling at the person who had chucked the grenade.

"YES? WHY ARE WE YELLING?" Guns and Roses Galore shouted back from across the battleground.

"'CAUSE YOUR CAPSLOCK IS ON!" She yelled.

"Oh."

"Yeah…I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" She screamed.

"I thought we were turning OFF the capslock…"

"Stop yelling and start fighting!" Sk8rgirl77 yelled, sitting on the side lines in an armchair, munching popcorn.

"…"

"…"

"So where'd you get the OCs? You steal them?" St. Iggy asked Guns.

"No…" he paused dramatically, "I made them."

"LE GASP!" She screeched, unable to process the fact that Guns and Roses Galore actually had an imagination. Then she re-evaluated the battlefield. Every OC that didn't belong to her of Saint was horribly malformed, Mary Sue-ish, or just plain clones. And then there was the grapefruit…

"And guess what?" Guns said.

"What?" St. Iggy called out mockingly. "I brought…" he trailed off.

"Who?"

There was a long minute of silence besides, you know, battle sounds.

"Wha…oh sorry." Guns yanked his headphones out of his ears. "Where were we?"

"…you brought someone…" St. Iggy said, twitching angrily.

"Oh yeah. I brought Spiderman." Then he proceeded to plug in his headphones once more.

St. Iggy's expression slowly turned to one of horror and she registered what he had just said.

Guns and Roses Galore smiled. He knew St. Iggy the Pyro well- too well. He knew her favorite foods, her favorite movies, some of her darkest secrets, and her worst fears. And on the top of that list were spiders. He watched as the once sadistic fangirl turned into a small terrified girl.

He actually would have felt bad for her if he hadn't been laughing so hard.

Suddenly Spiderman and his legion of spiders appeared, and she screeched.

"POPTARTS! TOASTER! ALAKAZAM!" She screamed, shouting utter nonsense. Guns realized too late that it wasn't truly nonsense, but her author powers. The spiders before her turned into spider-shaped Halloween cupcakes.

"Uh…" Guns, being a new author, hadn't learned how to tap in into his authoristic powers. Luckily, he had a plan.

It was then, at that precise second, while Pyro was looking uncertainly at the spider cupcakes for movement, that his OC jumped out and grabbed her from behind.

"LET GO OF ME YOU-*Censored by 4Kids*" She screamed. Guns pulled out his headphones once more and walked over to the struggling fangirl.

"So what do you have to say for yourself?" Guns asked, looking into the eyes of his friend.

"I just…I wanted…you…" the authoress burst into tears, catching Guns off guard. "You…forgot…my…b-birthday." She sobbed, tears flowing openly.

Roberto the OC released his grip on her. "How could you?" He said to his creator, who was standing awkwardly watching her.

And some say, Guns and Roses Galores' brain grew three sizes that day.

"Look, I'm sorry. I've had a lot on my mind lately," Guns explained like a normal person, "The hippogriffs keep escaping, and I've had writers block bad. Forgive me?"

Pyro looked uncertainly at her friend. "Yeah." She finally muttered, walking up to him and giving him a hug.

"!" The audience cooed.

"Where'd we get an audience?" Guns asked.

"Bought 'em on ebay. 99 cents." St. Iggy said wisely.

"Good deal."

"Quite."

Epilogue

St. Iggy the Pyro and Guns and Roses Galore made up. The battle between Pyro's and Gun's OCs became known as The Battle of Fallen Ocs. St. Fang of Boredom rushed off in search of Fang once more, right before the battle started. The real Fang kept flying toward Canada- *excuse me* Canadia. Fang the Clone XI the OC made Max let go of him and fell to his death. Max was told that the Fang that had died was nothing more then an OC and went off in search of the real Fang. St. Iggy was thrown into an insane asylum once more; however, she escaped soon after. The police are searching for her still in the Greater Lakes region. The rabid fan, Sky Ride, stopped messaging Guns and Roses Galore.

The readers of this story realized that this chapter was utterly pointless and they had waited so long for an fnicking crack fic. They were mad, but they directed their anger at St. Iggy the Pyro and not Guns and Roses Galore. Then, the end appeared.

*St. Fang of Boredom is arguably the most amazing fanfiction writer in the Maximum Ride section. If you enjoyed this chapter, you'll enjoy her stuff a thousand times more, so go read her. If you didn't enjoy this chapter, read her anyway.

**Disclaimer: St. Iggy the Pyro owns Kiri and this chapter. That's about it.**

**Discliamer 2: Guns and Roses Galore owns the story and his OCs.**

**Please do not sue them; they can't afford it.**

**Now back to the real story.**


	8. ALERT

_**Alert! Alert! Alert! I AM WRITING ANOTHER CHAPTER WOOOHOOO!**_


	9. The Hunt

**Me:**** I am back!**

**Total: I am too! **

**Gary the Grapefruit: Shut up no one cares**

**Total: WTF! What is that!**

**Me: It's a giant grapefruit you should have the last chapter it was very odd, but now we are getting side tracked onward towards the next chapter! :D**

The ground was scattered with fallen OCs. My mind is racing at a million thoughts per minute as I contemplating what the heck just happened. I had thought for sure that I had found Fang but once again my heart was ripped out of my chest like nothing else. My love might be forever gone if I don't follow him to Canada. For once I thought I had him but it turned out to be a clone and I got caught in one of the craziest fights I had ever seen but now with the help of Gary the Grapefruit sending me updates from Canada and Roberto using heat signatures to track him I will finally find the true love of my life. Then suddenly a large bullet whizzed past my head and it all went downhill from their. **  
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	10. Chapter 10

hey guys its been while and I am uploading this so that you know that i need help with new stories so hit me up if you have got something for me. 


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